Using Social Media Networks to Enhance Your Career

I often blog about the need to be very careful what you put on social media networks such as Facebook and MySpace. You always want to be careful that you don’t post anything that can get you in hot water with your present employer or a potential future employer.

Yet after reading Business Week’s May 22^nd “The Future of Tech” article “Beyond Blogs” by Stephen Baker and Heather Green, I realized I need to add advice on the other side of the coin:

If you are an employee of a company that has an internal social media network, be sure to post helpful comments and suggestions on the site. This is a way for new employees – even interns if given access to the internal social media network – to get recognition without coming on too strongly in their actual work assignment.

In referring to these internal company social media networks, the article says: “The new order favors those who network, create buzz, and promote their brand. Managers have to make sure that quieter employees don’t lose out.”

You may be uncomfortable going to company parties or company picnics. But there’s no need to be a wall flower or missing in action on a company’s internal social media network. Go ahead and add content to let your colleagues learn about you.

Of course, as always, make sure that what you add is appropriate. Remember, the most important brand to you is your own brand. Put it online respectfully and in appropriate networks.

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Good Interview Techniques Cross Over to Good Essay and Speech Writing

I’ve been listening to a teleseminar led by Carole Martin – “The Interview Coach.” I particularly admire her motto for interviews: “Leave your modesty at the door and bring your heart to the interview.”

I listened to Carole Martin coach a woman – let’s call her Dorothy – who is a principal of a small K-12 school and is interviewing for a position of a principal of a large high school. Dorothy would give her answers to Martin’s questions, and then Martin would demonstrate better answers to the questions.

And here’s what I was struck with that I had never before considered: The rules of good interviewing are the same as good essay writing and good speech writing. SPECIFICS, SPECIFICS, SPECIFICS. Paint a word picture in the mind of the interviewer, reader or listener.

For example, Dorothy said she is a people person. Then Martin said at least two sentences that used specific words to describe how Dorothy was a people person. The words Martin used created in my mind concrete images rather than the generalizations that Dorothy had used.

Aha! I thought. When I go on and on in my blogs about painting pictures in your college application essays, for example, I’m actually teaching skills that will be very helpful in interviews, whether those interviews are for college admission, an internship or a job.

Here’s my suggestion: For the next week, when you ask people specific questions about themselves, note how they answer. Do they give generalized answers or very specific ones that you can actually visualize? See which answers hold your interest the most.

Then stand in front of a mirror and play both roles: Ask yourself questions and answer those questions. Try to use as concrete language as possible and give very specific examples to illustrate your meaning.

You can find Carole Martin at www.interviewfitnesstraining.com. And you should definitely check out her site if you have any interest in working for the FBI. She coaches candidates for the FBI, and in her teleseminar she gave an example of the generalizations FBI candidates give to the question “Why do you want to work for the FBI?” and then an example of a much more specific answer. I was definitely impressed.

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Unexpected Email from College Freshman Praises FLIPPING BURGERS Advice

Yesterday I received an email from a college student just finishing his freshman year. I hadn’t heard from Alex M. in two years, since the spring of 2006 when he was a high school junior and I met with him in preparation for his applying to college in the fall.

The email was so thrilling to me that I asked Alex’s permission to use it for my blog. He graciously said yes. Here’s what Alex’s email to me said:

I just wanted to update you on my activities since we spoke last (which was quite a long time ago!). Overall I couldn't be happier with college and looking back I know this is the perfect place for me. There are a ton of opportunities to learn about business here, and I have tried to take advantage of them as much as possible.

I was selected among a competitive group of students to be a member of a student-run fund that manages $300,000 of our endowment, and I also started a business journal recently that has quickly grown to nearly 40 members.

I think just looking back on the year and how much I've progressed has really put the conversation we had our first meeting in perspective. I think the first thing you showed me was that a lot of my activities didn't really set me apart; I had a bunch of general things and while some were good, none were spectacular. At college, I have really strived to just find a few activities and pursue them as deeply as possible. I have found it to be much more rewarding.

I have also implemented the other skills you taught me - from saying thank you properly to bringing a pen and pad to every meeting. Every time I do one of those things, it reminds me of our meeting. I have also really worked to develop my network, which is something I know needs a lot of work going forward. However, I have already seen the rewards: I received a great internship at a mutual fund this summer through a professional I had only met once.

In summary, I just wanted to thank you again for the life lessons you taught me. I know I have progressed since our meeting, but I also know I have a lot of work to do. Thank you for helping me get on the right path.

Wow! See why I wanted to put this email on my blog? It’s terrific encouragement for other young people. And, also, it was because of meeting with Alex that I started down the path of writing advice for teens and young adults. I had complained to my older daughter that I had just met with a high school student (Alex) who had so much potential yet wasn’t at all prepared to maximize that potential. She said, “So write a book to help other kids.”

Two years later the FLIPPING BURGERS AND BEYOND book is written but not published; I am blogging about the advice; and I’m currently working on a way to bring the book’s material directly to those who could most benefit from the advice. Thanks, Alex, for having an open mind and being willing to learn and grow. I’m so proud of what you’ve accomplished in your first year of college. Keep up the great work!

How to Deal With a Verbal Attack

In Philadelphia sometime in the mid-1970s I took an assertiveness training course based on the principles in Manuel J. Smith’s book WHEN I SAY NO I FEEL GUILTY. To this day, more than 30 years later, those concepts I learned have been of tremendous value to me.

When you are assertive, you stand up for yourself without getting aggressive. And the following technique I’m going to share with you is a great technique whether you are 15 or 50. (If you want to get this information from the horse’s mouth, you can go on Amazon and find the book.)

The most important point to remember in the following technique is that sometimes a person is angry at you and NOTHING you say will change that person’s mind. The more excuses (even if true) that you make, the more opportunities you have given the other person to attack you solely because that person WANTS to attack you.

Here’s the exercise we did in the assertiveness training class in order to de-sensitize ourselves from feeling compelled to make excuses. First I will give you the “script” the way most of us do it. Then I’ll give you the “assertiveness training script.”

PHYLLIS: Sally, your hair really looks bad today.
SALLY: I didn’t have time to blow dry it this morning because I got up late.
PHYLLIS: You should have set your alarm clock so you wouldn’t oversleep.
SALLY: I did set my alarm clock. But my cat knocked it off the table in the middle of the night and the clock broke.
PHYLLIS: You shouldn’t let your cat sleep in your bedroom.
SALLY: I don’t usually but …
PHYLLIS: Face it, you’re just inept.

Got the idea? Every “excuse” that Sally says just gives Phyllis more ammunition to attack Sally. Here’s the alternative:

PHYLLIS: Sally, your hair really looks bad today.
SALLY: You’re right, it does.
(Phyllis is shocked that Sally agreed with her, but Phyllis is in the mood to attack Sally so Phyllis keeps going.)
PHYLLIS: You should have blown it dry this morning.
SALLY: You’re right, I should have.
(Now Phyllis is really thrown off her stride. It’s no fun attacking someone who doesn’t get upset when attacked. So Phyllis has to find an exit line.)
PHYLLIS: I hope you’ll blow dry your hair tomorrow.
Sally nods and Phyllis walks off.

Try this technique the next time someone verbally attacks you for seemingly no reason except to attack you. Then let me know how this technique worked for you.

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Getting Feedback at a New Job Often Requires a Balancing Act

Cathy Goodwin of www.copy-cat-copywriting.com read her copy of the May 20th Wall Street Journal earlier in the day than I got to my copy. And then in an email to her ezine subscribers about three tips for blog topics, she mentioned Sarah E. Needleman’s WSJ article “It Pays to Plan Ahead When Taking a New Job.”

Needleman writes: “In the first month, ask for your boss’s opinion of how you’re doing on a weekly basis. Then scale back to once every two to three weeks.”

Cathy Goodwin commented: “Gimme a break. Can you imagine a new employee hounding the boss with that infamous ‘How am I doing’ question?”

The gist of what Needleman and Goodwin each said has relevance for young people at their first internship or job. It requires walking a fine line between making sure you’re doing what is expected of you and not bothering your boss so much that he/she wishes to have never hired you.

Different situations call for different tactics. One tactic is to listen carefully to what someone says to you. Frequently it’s the subtext – what he or she doesn’t say – that is the real comment on how you’re doing.

Another tactic is to check with a colleague for feedback. In fact, if you asked a different colleague for help with each different part of your job, you might have found a way to establish connections for yourself with your co-workers without burdening any one person with excessive feedback questions.

Another tactic is to ask at the time you are offered a position: What kind of feedback will I get on how I’m doing? Will I only get formal feedback after three months? Or will you let me know whenever you have a concern about what I’m doing?

If the person to whom you’re asking these questions is an effective manager, he/she should pick up on your subtext – and understand you are giving permission, if warranted, to correct your actions before they can get you fired.

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All Social Media Networks Are Not the Same Regarding Privacy Settings

When giving career advice on safeguarding a positive image on the internet, I often warn that you must be very careful what you post on social media networks such as MySpace and Facebook. More and more potential employers are checking out these sites and others such as LinkedIn before offering interviews to potential employees.

From an employer’s point of view this makes good sense. If an employer finds a compromising picture of you that you have posted on the web, he/she will think twice about entrusting you with company knowledge. What might you post about the company – photos and all?

The grey area that probably many high school students and college students wonder about is not compromising pictures (such as scantily clad photos) but photos that show you having “fun” (okay, drinking and partying) with your friends.

Yesterday I was pleasantly surprised to learn from the book I’m currently reading -- “Facebook for Dummies” by Carolyn Abram and Leah Pearlman -- that there are different privacy settings available on Facebook. You can even block an official friend on Facebook from seeing all of your profile by using a privacy option called “limited profile.” (This means you can be a friend with your boss and still block her from seeing certain things on your profile.)

This seems a great middle ground solution for young people who don’t want to forgo putting any “fun” pictures on the internet. There are still some risks – for example, if you decide to change certain settings on Facebook you can unknowingly automatically reveal this blocked info.

As I’m now learning, there are major differences between the top social media networking sites. As I understand it, on MySpace you can see anyone’s profile by doing a search for that person. On Facebook you can only see someone’s profile after that someone has accepted you as a friend.

The “Facebook for Dummies” book emphasizes that your profile can only ever be seen by a very small percentage of people on Facebook. This statement is not true for all social media networks.

Before putting “fun” photos of yourself on the internet, the first rule of thumb should be to find out which sites prevent anyone (such as a potential employer) from looking at your profile without your knowledge. That should be the number one criteria for where you put your photos.

The second rule of thumb should be – if you do put “fun” photos on a social media network that allows you to block unwanted views of your profile, be sure you read all the instructions for this blocking feature carefully. You don’t want to accidentally remove the blocks just when you’re up for an interview for a job you really want. And, oh no! – the potential employer has just seen that photo of you dressed as a Martian and chugging a beer.

I still stand by my warning that, for complete positive identity protection, you should put nothing on the internet you wouldn’t want a potential employer to view. Yet, if you really, really want to post some “fun” photos, do this on a safe site with individual privacy controls – and set those controls!

Second Life Offers Alternative Teen Summer Jobs to Flipping Burgers

“While his friends scramble for jobs flipping burgers or bagging groceries this summer …” These opening words of the May 16th Wall Street Journal article “My Virtual Summer Job” by Alexandra Alter caught my attention even though, at 8 a.m. this morning at the car wash and with no decaf coffee (I don’t drink caffeinated), in hand I was barely awake.

The article goes on to describe how teens are using their skills to make real money on virtual world websites. One teen expects to make $4,000 a month this summer on Teen Second Life by using the site’s graphic-design tools to build homes, offices and schools. A set of twins who are inventors on Second Life and sell their gadgets expect to each make about $2,500 a month this summer.

In the Journal’s Independent Street blog by Wendy Bounds in connection with this article she wrote: “Yet as the next generation of builders, metalsmiths, designers and architects increasingly use pixels instead of penny nails and pencils to create, will there by enough talented craftsmen and women to put solid roofs over our heads and well-made clothes on our backs?” And she then added: “Do we value that kind of bricks-and-mortar work properly anymore?”

Here’s the comment I posted in response to Bounds’ blog: “This trend can be looked at in a positive light – these virtual experiences can be internships for the real versions of these jobs. And these virtual jobs can be great to write about for college application essays. These kids are following their passion at an early age, which is what I blog about at www.flippingburgersandbeyond.blogspot.com."

While – disclaimer coming – I have never played Second Life or Teen Second Life, I have frequently stated that high school and college graduates have very little knowledge about the basics of life – such as balancing their checkbooks, hiring a plumber, paying the utilities bill. If these virtual universes with their own real currency can help teach teens and young adults about these basics, I think this could be a very good thing. (As long as these virtual worlds don’t take over the real words of teens and young people.)

I’ve read numerous articles about how the mind doesn’t know the difference between the real thing and a simulation. When professional golfers, for example, stand at a tee and visualize their next swing, their mind can’t distinguish between the visual swing and the subsequent actual swing. And virtual simulations are used for training airplane pilots, among others.

It seems to me that there can be considerable good coming out of teens and young people earning real money in virtual worlds, including the encouragement of entrepreneurship and the concept of working hard without adult prodding. Let’s not bemoan the end of the real world yet.